Wandering in my mind

In 1985 the eighth of November fell on a Friday. Woo Hoo! Begin birthday celebrations on Friday and have a long weekend to follow. How sweet is that? My best friend made plans to come for the weekend with her two kids and I arranged for a niece to stay over to babysit. We didn’t have major plans, just visiting some other friends in Calgary, with a couple stops along the way.

Our first stop was in a little bar two towns toward Calgary. The evening was young and we just stopped in for a few minutes. As we walked in, a hat whizzed by Carolyn’s nose, followed by the hat catcher. He laughed as he apologized for nearly taking her out and explained he and his buddies were celebrating the end of the road construction season – a wrap party if you will- for having finished a local interchange just outside of town. Following us to a table, he sat down and asked Carolyn if he knew her, as she seemed familiar. Now, Carolyn worked as a bartender one town back and was always running into people she did not remember, but who remembered her. So she figured this was just more of the same. We never did find out if it was a line, or if he had been in her bar. After a while of being yelled at from his friends a couple tables over, he asked us to join them. Since we were only there for a little while, we figured why not.

They had a few tables pulled together and were an assorted group – flag girls, surveyors, road workers and some local friends. We met them all and had the drink we had stopped for and got ready to head out. However, when we went out, the evening had changed from cool and clear to snowing. Not knowing how long this would last, or if it would get worse, we decided to stay a while longer and see what turns the weather took. Back in we went and were as warmly welcomed back as if we had been gone for days. Nothing like a warm welcome, and some of those boys were almighty cute.

Along about this time the band showed up and began playing. Now this group was out for a good time and had, apparently, been there since two in the afternoon. A long time to wait for the band to arrive. While a few found there way to the dance floor, one got up and came around the table to me. He was wearing a pair of white highway department coveralls pulled half off and tied around his waist and a pair of heavy Kodiak snow boots. Not exactly dancing shoes, but he asked me to dance and after asking if he thought he could with those huge boots on, to the dance floor we went. He was a sweetie, and we had a few dances, a few drinks a few games of pool, and the evening speed by.

Now it was after last call and the bar was closing. A pair of the local friends, Pat and Hal, suggested everyone come over to their place in the trailer park a couple blocks away. Well, why not? It quickly became apparent why not. They had a smallish trailer there and everyone packed in. Word went around quickly to not use the washroom as the pipe had frozen with the snow and it couldn’t be flushed. Of course that did not stop some one from using it and leaving lumps of unflushables (poop reference just for Nutz). They apparently only had one tape and Meatloaf’s Bat Out of Hell played over and over and over. I never have to hear Paradise by the Dashboard Light again. There was a dedicated group of non tobacco smokers lighting up and I soon found myself in need of some air. There is something about pot smoke in the air that tends to quickly make me nauseous, so I told Carolyn were I would be for a few minutes and headed outside.

Feeling slightly better, I turned and found my dancing partner coming out the door behind me. He walked with me and we just talked for a little while. He asked me if he could call me sometime, so I tore my name and phone number from the side of a cheque and gave it to him. This is where our first meeting story always takes a fork in the road. He says he leaned in and gave me a gentle kiss, and he could tell I was thinking he was hot I wanted to get to know him more. I say he leaned in and gave me a gentle kiss and I was thinking please god, don’t let me vomit on his boots. I mean, I had gone out to get into clear air. Anyway, Carolyn came out then and we walked back to the car and headed for home, arriving in time to watch the sunrise.

Now, there were a lot of people at that table. And names are not always my strong point. So the next afternoon when I got up, I knew I had met some one named Blake or Blaine or Blair or Brad the night before. I just couldn’t remember it. So when he called on Sunday and said “This is Blair, I met you Friday night” I agreed to go to out with him only because of his manners. See how important nice manners are? After all, how could I have gone and tried to avoid calling him by name all evening since I couldn’t remember his name? I met him in town Monday and we drove to Calgary for a movie. Most of the choices at the theatre were action shoot em ups, so we saw Back to the Future. That was the first and last movie we ever went to. He turned out to be an avid movie renter and over the years we have watched more good and even more bad movies than most folks see in a lifetime, but if I suggest going to the theatre he will always reply “I took you to one….once”. When we got back to town after the evening, he proved to be a more than sufficient kisser with definite possibilities.

He called twice during the week, came out to my house on the next weekend (and left really, really horny, according to him, since my niece was still there) and the next weekend he again called and showed up. With no niece underfoot we found out how suitably we fit together.

Somehow, despite my belief that I was completely self sufficient and in need of no one, he worked things so I began to believe having someone around who was smart and fun, a good kisser, could talk about anything and could make me laugh was not such a bad idea. We were married in October of 1987 and, while I did once tell him I would divorce him, but I was too afraid of getting custody of the kids, I don’t think he believed me. We will celebrate our 19th anniversary this year. For somebody I met in a bar, I haven’t had to kick him to the curb yet.

With all the poop discussions going on of late, I thought I would post this set of cake directions. You can see what it is all about from the picture:

1 spice or German chocolate cake mix
1 white cake mix
2 large pkg vanilla instant pudding mix
1 large pkg vanilla sandwich cookies
green food colouring
12 small Tootsie Rolls

1 new kitty litter pan
1 new plastic kitty litter pan liner
1 new pooper scooper

Bake the cake mixes and make and chill the puddings.
Make the cookies into crumbs in a food processor and take out ¼ cup. Add a few drops of green food colouring to the ¼ cup of crumbs and mix.
Crumble the cakes and toss with half of the plain cookie crumbs and the pudding. You may have some pudding left over, as you don’t want to make it too soggy. Line the new litter box with wax paper and put the cake mixture in. Heat 3 tootsie rolls in the mike and shape so the ends taper and they have a little curl. Bury them close to the top of the cake in the pan. Sprinkle the rest of the plain cookie crumbs over the top, and top off with the green cookie crumbs (it’s supposed to look like the litter that has chlorophyll). Almost melt 3 more tootsie rolls and scrape into pan & sprinkle with crumbs. You can put the pan on a newspaper and sprinkle some crumbs around.

I’d say enjoy at this point, but I think that can only be done by children under the age of eight. I don’t see many reasons to make this any more, but it was fun. Disgusting, but fun.

Older DD called this morning. Because she has to work tonight, she drove to school instead of taking the bus. And she left a few minutes late. So she decided to make up time. She now owes $120 for a speeding ticket. And she didn’t save any time. In fact she was later than she would have been, had she stuck to the speed limit. I want to say “How many times have I told you speed limits are enforced, and not to speed?”. But I won’t. I also won’t contribute to the ticket fund, as some things have to be learned the hard way. I do feel bad for her though, so I will make one of her favourite foods for supper, split pea soup. I make it with the dried green peas, not the yellow ones, and lots of ham pieces. Care for a bowl?

Oh, and the lilacs are out:

I love, love, love the Sunday Paper. Big and stuffed with pull out sections and coloured comics and editorials. I sit at the table and read the whole paper front to back, enjoying the whole process. What could be better than this little weekly oasis of newsprint? Unless it is spending a couple hours out in the hammock in the sunshine. How to decide between the two? I didn’t. I had both.

Tomorrow will come quickly enough, and with it having to drive to the lake for the day. As I go through town I will try not to remember that if the lights are timed for 35 mph, then they are also times for 70 mph.

What a great weekend of lazing about. Hope your weekend is as enjoyable.

I thought last week was the season end for Desperate Housewives, but now I see that it is a 2 hour ending this Sunday. Not out of things to watch yet!

I registered youngest DD for summer camp today, one both have gone to west of Calgary for the last few years, so that takes care of one week for her. Older DD is going to work this summer, so has decided to pass on camp this year. They enjoy camp and I enjoy their time away. As a child I only went to camp one year and, as an early developer, I spent a week trying to hide a bra that was not for training, but necessary, unlike the others in my cabin.

Cut a couple feet off the carragana hedge this morning, now lunch and then off to weed that stupid flower bed. If all goes well today, there won't bee too much to do over the long weekend except enjoy it. Yay!

The weather is just beautiful here (though we could use a light rain, just not like New England). It is supposed to be around 30C/85F today. I managed to get my patio pots all planted with the new annuals yesterday and they are looking perky this morning. I have chocolate chip muffins baking before the day gets hot and younger DD and I will take a trip to the dump this afternoon to take the garbage out. A chore that is not my favourite, but has to be done regularly. DH does it during the winter, but now that his long work season is here he heads out at 6:30 am and gets home around 7:30 pm. But overall it looks like a good day shaping up.

Swiped from MM's blog cause I really liked this list:
I AM: tired, so tired of dealing with health issues
I WANT: to be able to walk distances again
I WISH: my flower beds would weed themselves
I HATE: cleaning the clutter that accumulates everywhere
I MISS: drying dishes while my mom washes them – a very special time
I FEAR: making mistakes in child rearing
I HEAR: what I choose to-selective hearing can be wonderful
I WONDER: where I would be, had I made different choices
I REGRET: a few things, but I refuse to dwell on those regrets since I like who I ended up becoming
I AM NOT: afraid of thunderstorms and eagerly await the first one of the season so I can watch the lightning play
I DANCE: very rarely, though I will sway to the music
I SING: when I feel good, when I am happy or even just content
I CRY: when I am overwhelmed, for good or bad
I AM NOT ALWAYS: nice. Sometimes sarcasm comes way too easily
I MAKE WITH MY HANDS: bread – when I make bread, I make a batch of 8 loaves
I WRITE: because some things just have to get out
I CONFUSE: my DH, and sometimes I have set out to do it on purpose.

AND the TAR wrap up is on tonight. Joy, Joy, Joy!

What has happened to the social use of the phrase "I'm sorry"? Why does it seem so many are ready to argue with you over nothing? Yesterday I spent my day at the pre-admission clinic in Calgary having assorted discussions and tests. The second last item was a visit with the anesthesiologist. After our visit was concluded I asked him what was next. He said just wait in this office, I'll tell the desk we're done and they will let you know where to go for your next appointment. There were magazines there, so I read while I waited. After around 45 minutes, I finally gathered up my stuff and went out to the desk where I explained I had been waiting (an hour at this point). The woman on the desk checked the board and said only labs were left, and why hadn't I just come to the desk? I said the doctor had said to wait in the room. This is where a simple "I'm sorry, we didn't realize you were waiting" would have been appropriate. Instead I get "I'm sure he didn't say that". So I had to spend even more time driving through rush hour traffic to get out of the city when I could have been out an hour earlier. Overall, it didn't really matter - I had the whole day to get this stuff done, so no big deal - it was the readiness to tell me I was wrong that I found puzzling.

It seems customer service and common courtesy have become rarities, and I am so surprised by them when they actually do happen. To all the people who do practise courtesy, thank you. I just wish it was more common.

This is a computer generated decal. I could drive the roomy van and sit up high (as Swami does) but still have a little bit of the illusion of driving a sporty car. If I decided to become a bank robber, would this aid my getaway, as the police search for the driver of a red Mazda? I guess, as long as I only have to pay the insurance rates for the mini van, it would be okay. Would you drive it? And what decal would you have applied?

Also, this got a mark of 95% and came home from school yesterday from oldest DD. She says she wants to have it on Sunday with ice cream. Isn't it sweet?

The grass is growing nicely and everything looks so fresh and green. I need to bring the lawn mower out.

DH has the boat out, getting ready for the first time out on the long weekend. He is going to use all my hot water tonight, washing it (which, since it is a boat and goes in water, I have a hard time understanding, unless it is just one of those guy things.).

Blankets can be hung on the line in the sunshine for that oh so freshness. But not today cause they are doing the fields around the house and the dirt from the cultivators will blow all over them.

The leaves are coming out on everything and the new shoots are shooting up. I need to bring the hedge clippers out.

I got my car back with a door that was hit in a parking lot completely repaired and looking new. But when I pushed the switch to lock the doors the passenger door did not lock so I will have to take it back.

The wind has finally died down and it looks like tonight will be perfect for a barbeque. But I will have to dig in that overly full freezer to find what I want to cook – it may be that I just take the first acceptable meat I find, kind of like a treasure hunt.

Any more?

There has to be some significance in the fact that today is the third one. PET scan I mean. I will be injected by a nurse, cowaring behind a lead screen, with radio-active dye, rest for an hour while it spreads, then s-l-o-w-l-y run through a large tube for the scan. I figure since third time is a charm, then today is the day I get my super powers, just like Spiderman.

Imagine, a pink and blue super hero costume as I patrol Blogland for evil doers. Attentive, vigilant and alert while on patrol. What's that? What goes on here? My survey senses are tingling - oh wait, it was just my cell phone still on vibrate.

A good day to all!

I tried www.myheritage.com today. You upload a picture of yourself and the site uses face recognition technology to compare your face against 3200 celebrities. Apparently I am a combination of: Kathleen Turner, Claudia Schiffer, Chaka Khan, Brittany Spears and Harry Belafonte.

The funny thing is, you can acutally see pieces in the celebrities that do match. So Kathleen Turner, Harry Belafonte and I all share the same nose. I would have preferred Claudia's nose, but if I ever decided to change things with plastic surgery I don't think I would start with the nose. I would get rid of my Cross Your Waist bras.

I did have to register to see the results.

I? am weak. When faced with a proud husband reviewing a (very good) report card who says, “She has her father’s brains” a strong person would be able to prevent the words, “I wondered what you did with them” from spilling out. Apparently I was the only one who found it funny.

Where have the popsicles and fudgesickles gone? Everything in the ice cream cooler was a specialty item. Polar Ices with REAL FRUIT JUICE and Fudge Blasters with double fudge centres. Turtle bars, rolo bars, even the ice cream sandwich was an Oreo Cookie Sandwich.

The squirrel seems to be the start of an invasion. There was a porcupine in the rhubarb patch this morning. And the cat is sitting by a mound of dirt at the side of the yard, hoping a mole shows his head. I need to find out the best way to rid a yard of moles, hopefully before it tunnels all over the place.

I need to add dates to my grocery list. Somehow gruyere cheese does not taste right with out a nice sticky date. Bite of cheese, bite of date. Delicious.

Desperate Housewives and Grey’s Anatomy are on tonight. Thank heavens for sweeps. At least there are some new episodes then.

I am going in circles. Summer holidays are fast approaching and I hate trying to plan anything without all the information. DH wants to go to a fishing tournament in Saskatchewan, likely the one in July. But his going will depend on if I have to have surgery on my throat to remove the remaining cancer cells. So next week I have to go for another PET scan and to sign consent forms for another biopsy, which may happen on the 25th of this month. The results will decide if surgery is needed and then a date will be selected. In the meantime, the youngest DD is looking over the camp schedule and trying to pick a week to go and I want to pick a week to take the kids and run off to my mom’s and the oldest DD will have to ask for that week off from her summer job. If DH goes to the tournament, we can spend a few days at the lake with him and then go on to Manitoba to visit mom, but he won’t know if he is going until I know if I am having surgery. And if I have surgery, will I be okay to travel? And the circle just keeps whirling and I know less every time the carousel goes around.

About the only fact I have is that DH and I are adults. There is definite proof of this. For example, our fridge contains more food than beer. And our houseplants survive, and none of them can be smoked. This means we have to make our own decisions and without information and details, we can’t decide on a single thing. What is becoming more and more apparent to me is that I need a break. I need to stay in the bedroom I grew up in and be called when dinner is ready and my biggest decision is what to wear.

I want my mommy.

A noisy little bugger has moved in
And stays in a shed covered with tin
He’ll sit and he’ll shout
And refuse to move out
You’d think he was one of my children

I first met C in 1980. I was fighting my way through a bitter divorce and she was in the last stages of her pregnancy, new to Canada and a long way from South Dakota. Her husband was employed in the oilfields, and was away a lot. We met over coffee with her next door neighbour, a good friend of mine, and it quickly became apparent that we had a lot in common and weekends would see us at one or the others house, watching movies, talking (we had so much to talk about, it was amazing) and just hanging about. One cold winter night, having watched a movie until late, I started my car to return home. At 2 in the morning with only a couple blocks to go, it hardly seemed worthwhile to scrape the windows. After all, I could see through the little space clearing at the bottom of the windshield. Apparently I couldn’t see well enough though, as was proved when I mistook a cleared sidewalk for the ice covered road and turned onto it, twisting the stop sign upright into an L shape and sending the street name X sailing high into the air, all of which I could see though the back window which the car had managed to clear. Perhaps I should have been driving in reverse, but I finished making it home and called C, who swore that if she was ever asked, I had been in my own home all night. And laughed. A lot.

Eventually I found a little house in the countryside and moved further away and she finally delivered that precious daughter, but we still continued to drive back and forth to visit. After all, it was only a half hour drive now. When her second daughter began to consider entering the world she called at 10 in the evening – things seemed to be starting and hubby would not be able to get back until the next day – would I come? Was there any doubt? The nurse at the hospital said it would be some time as it was intermittent and not regular, so C refused to stay. After all, the coffee at home was better than the hospital brew. So we sat up all night cause she couldn’t sleep and the next morning hubby arrived on time. I went straight to work and had a very long day that was capped with the phone call from her hubby that they had another daughter.

Eventually work required them to move and now she was over two hours away. But still, we called at least once a week and took turns driving back and forth for occasional visits. She came for the weekend of my birthday in 1985, full of plans for where we were going on Friday night. C was the outgoing friendly one to whom everyone gravitated and I was the quiet shy friend. We never made it past our first stop and that was the night I met my husband to be. In 1987 C stood beside me as I wed. Then came my first pregnancy and with her life in that new town and my new life, we weren’t talking as often, and with new people in our lives, we didn’t have as much, it seemed, to talk about. But although the time between calls kept lengthening, I knew were she was and could still manage an occasional call.

This week, I was cleaning out a closet and in the bottom of a box of clothes I found a sweater. It was one I had worn the night I met my husband. With yesterday on my mind, I realized that I had not spoken to C for a couple years now. So I looked up the number and called. The lady who answered said I had the wrong number. How long is a number held before it is reused? So I called 411 for the new listing, but there is no listing for C anymore. They are gone. Perhaps back to the US, but it could be anywhere, considering the type of work her husband does. And despite the fact that it had been so long since we talked, I feel I have lost something. I know I have lost something.

People come and go in our lives all the time. Perhaps it was just a natural ending. So our lives move on. I hope, C, that things all worked out for you, and your children did go into the fields they were headed for. I hope someday you find a reminder and check to see if my number is still listed. I hope I am still here if you call. If you do, I will set aside any weekend you want. But most of all, I hope you are well and happy.

Rice Cakes – They are about the size of a potato chip. They come in the same flavours as potato chips. You can have more of them (dietary wise) than potato chips. They have lots of crunch, just like potato chips. So why are they unable to provide the same snack satisfaction?

Telemarketers – Once upon a time when they called they were on the line ready to try to sell you something. Now the phone rings and when you pick it up, you are on hold until the salesperson comes on line. It’s bad enough when you call somewhere and have to wait on hold, but when did it become acceptable to phone you just to put you on hold?

Telephone Carriers – Why, when you finally find a better long distance carrier and switch over, does your original carrier then call and tell you about a new plan that will match the one you just switched to? Don’t they realize I would not have switched, had they matched the other plan in the beginning? Do they really think, after paying them more all along, that I am inclined to switch back just because they lost a lot of folks to a better offer and decided to match it?

What issues are causing you consternation today?

My babies are growing up! My oldest DD has a thing about needles and has always insisted I be there for any. But today she is going to the dentist for a filling, and while at first she asked me to come hold her hand for the needle, when this morning finally arrived, she announced that there was no need for me to make a special trip to town just for this and she would be fine alone. (She did add that she might get a girl friend to go to the appointment with her, but wasn’t sure yet.)

This will be her first needle without her father or me in attendance. I am sure my hand is permanently cramped from being squeezed over the last couple years, especially during all the tests and treatments for Hodgkin’s. This seems to me another road sign on the highway to independence, even bigger than the first boyfriend, and occasionally I get glimpses of the adult developing though all this. That adult promises to be a well rounded, fair and likeable person, but does she really need to be in such a hurry to get here? And how could this all have happened – surely there has not been enough time between this and that little bundle I brought home.

At least I still have the youngest to be my baby for a little while longer – although she has been making noises lately about being able to get her beginner’s driving license next February.